[SkiBum80]

It may be difficult on the recruiting trail:

MINOR SUGGESTIONS IN RED BELOW:

Recruit:  Will you be the head coach when I'm at Stanford?

Reich:  No  That isn't the plan. Never say never, but Stanford has a double secret plus plan to find my successor who will extend my incredible (anticipated) success. I'm exceptional at my job -- I had a winning record all seasons except one in the NFL, and I'm an offensive guru who took the Philadelphia Eagles to a Super Bowl win with an average NFL quarterback in Carson Wentz and a below-average NFL QB in Nick Foles. The next coach will be even better than me.

Recruit:  Who will be the head coach?

Reich:  I have no idea.   A world-class head football coach. Stanford has perfected their approach to NIL and now knows how to exploit the portal perfectly. The next head coach will be walking into an ideal situation. If you want to play in the NFL, Stanford is the place you want to be. If you want an extraordinary life after your NFL career, Stanford is the place you need to be.

Recruit:  What system on offense will Stanford use when I'm there?

Reich:  I have no idea. See above answer. Stanford is all about the finest preparation for your future. Stanford's devotion to an exceptional offense will be second to none. They are scouring the nation for the best coach and the most unique offense suited to your talents. I'm really, really good -- I led the offense of the Philadelphia Eagles to a Super Bowl win -- and the next coach's offense will be even better than mine, if you can imagine that.

Is the double secret plus plan anything like double secret probation?

Exactly the same. Made up on the spot in hopes that it sounds good...

Yeah, well I'm sure the 2025 version of Stanford football will be outstanding in its own way.

I'm especially looking forward to our float in our Homecoming parade

[SkiBum80]

It may be difficult on the recruiting trail:

MINOR SUGGESTIONS IN RED BELOW:

Recruit:  Will you be the head coach when I'm at Stanford?

Reich:  No  That isn't the plan. Never say never, but Stanford has a double secret plus plan to find my successor who will extend my incredible (anticipated) success. I'm exceptional at my job -- I had a winning record all seasons except one in the NFL, and I'm an offensive guru who took the Philadelphia Eagles to a Super Bowl win with an average NFL quarterback in Carson Wentz and a below-average NFL QB in Nick Foles. The next coach will be even better than me.

Recruit:  Who will be the head coach?

Reich:  I have no idea.   A world-class head football coach. Stanford has perfected their approach to NIL and now knows how to exploit the portal perfectly. The next head coach will be walking into an ideal situation. If you want to play in the NFL, Stanford is the place you want to be. If you want an extraordinary life after your NFL career, Stanford is the place you need to be.

Recruit:  What system on offense will Stanford use when I'm there?

Reich:  I have no idea. See above answer. Stanford is all about the finest preparation for your future. Stanford's devotion to an exceptional offense will be second to none. They are scouring the nation for the best coach and the most unique offense suited to your talents. I'm really, really good -- I led the offense of the Philadelphia Eagles to a Super Bowl win -- and the next coach's offense will be even better than mine, if you can imagine that.

Is the double secret plus plan anything like double secret probation?

Exactly the same. Made up on the spot in hopes that it sounds good...

Yeah, well I'm sure the 2025 version of Stanford football will be outstanding in its own way.

I'm especially looking forward to our float in our Homecoming parade